What the hell is the point

but anyway, another fantastic blog:

http://accidentaldong.blogspot.com/

The name says it all.

Hiatus

[Update: Still Dancing.]

Week long. I'll mostly be up in the clubs, in case you need me. My shit's gonna be on fire.

Sorry For Not Reporting On the Giants' Ongoing Gayness Extravaganza, Too Busy Getting Shit-tossed At The Diamond Dave Concert

Yeah, I was there. And that shit was hot.

Lincecum Was Just A little Embarrassed, That's All

Timmy had arguably his worst outing of the season last night, going just 6 innings, giving up 5 runs, 9 base-runners, and recording just 2 Ks. He even walked in a run, something I never remember him doing.

So what was going on? Just a bad night? A fatigued arm? Did the Reds have him figured out?

Let me suggest this hypothesis:

Tim Lincecum, he of normally immaculate complexion (my gf reminds me of this every time he takes the mound), had a giant zit on his chin last night. I was watching on HD and I could see it very clearly. If it wasn't a zit - which it was - it was some other kind of ghastly, protruding sore of equal unsightliness.

Since we all know that Lincecum is a wee bit on the vain end of the spectrum, and also that this kind of thing - a zit - is foreign territory for him, it's fair to surmise that Timmy simply could not concentrate on the task at hand. He was too preoccupied with how he looked. His whole psyche was a mess. Yes, Timmy is a professional, but he is still human.

It's no coincidence that Timmy spent an inordinate amount of time between pitches trying to cover his mouth with his jersey. Anyone who saw the game can vouch for this, as can the photograph below:

Timmy tries to cover his massive zit as he walks of the hill at G.A.B.

Poor guy. I don't think there's any reason to be concerned about Lincecum's pitching per se, but I think it'd be wise if someone sends him a jar of Clearasil pads or something, just in case.

Tuesday Tone-Setter

Sometimes politics can be a little overwhelming. The issues become too complex to comprehend in any kind of manageable way, too nuanced, too muddied by jargon and technical analysis. In times like these, when our governments are arguing themselves into a hole in the ground, we need a clear, strong voice to spell it all out for us. (HT The Internet Is Terrible)



And some more AWESOME Weebls:

Pablo Pandaval Is Seriously Not Human

During yesterday's game Krukow told one of the most insane stories I've ever heard.

Apparently Sandoval is a natural lefty and only taught himself how to throw righty after realizing he'd never make it as an outfielder.

That's crazy enough, given that Sanodval has a freaking cannon over at 3B. People just don't throw with both arms like that. It doesn't happen.

What's really absurd though is that according to Krukow, Sandoval can throw a baseball from homeplate into McCovey Cove...with both hands!!!

That's 370 feet, people. Over 125 yards.

Sandoval's feat is like one of those doctored Reebok football commercials, except it's real.

That's fucking pandamonium.

-----

And doesn't this make you wonder what it would be like if Pablo pitched. Could you imagine having a switch-pitcher who could also hit like he does? Holy shit. He'd be the greatest baseball player in the history of the universe.

Reason 8,004 Why the Internet is Better Than Everything Else Combined

Honestly, I'd much rather see this than the actual thing:



• In other news, I spent about 10 hours playing Dragon Warrior this weekend on vNES. I was fucking owning that shit. I was up to Lvl 14, with a Broad Sword, the Full Plate, and the Large Shield, plus Dragon Scales, two pairs of Wings, 6(!) Magic Keys, and about 8K in gold.

I was mostly just hanging out on that little island south of Rimuldar putting the beatdown on a cadre of Wyverns, Gold Men, and Wolflords.

Anyway, when I went to go save the game, my save code got all messed up when I copy and pasted it and now I can't get it back. That shit pisses me off to no end.

If anyone out there in internet-land has a save code for Dragon Warrior on vNES – more or less around Lvl 14-ish – PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE e-mail me with it. I'll totally give you a handjob, or whatever you're into.